Chadwick

 

 

 

Rest in power, Chadwick Boseman. You were truly a talent, a role model, and an advocate for the young, gifted, and black. 

I was heartbroken over his death for three reasons:

1) I was a fan. He was a beautiful man. He was a great actor. I watched Black Panther 4 times in theatres. That's a record for me. The challenge scene where he's wearing shorts was a treat for the eyes. I heard nothing but kind words at work when he worked on our movies.

2) He was a representative of black people in the media. I can only imagine how hard it is to lose a hero. In this reawakening, in this effort to show people BLACK LIVES MATTER, it hurts to lose Chadwick from that fight.

3) He died of cancer. His 2020 death isn't due to coronavirus. It was due to a disease that still has no cure. Fuck cancer.

Every article about his death had three common elements

1) His acting accomplishments, notably Black Panther.

2) Chadwick was 43 when he died.

3) He was diagnosed with cancer in 2016.

Why did that last point trigger me? Because I was also diagnosed with cancer in 2016. Thinking about all of the treatment he had to endure, it hurts. Thinking about all of the things he accomplished in between, it amazes. He was a movie star. He had to film, he had to promote, he had to endure. All the while, stupid freaking cancer lived inside him, caused pain, and then spread to take over. Learning of his struggle, I admire him even more, which in turn, makes losing him hurt even more.

He was 43 and it had been 4 years since he learned he had cancer. Last year, I called my birthday 30 & 3. I turned 30 and it was 3 years since my diagnosis. I realized I'd always be counting my cancer age, so I embraced it. Now I realize, it's something that will always be included in the articles.

 

Two Hamilton lyrics come to mind:

 

Death doesn't discriminate -- At any point, we can die. It can be from cancer, from a helicopter crash, from a pandemic, from a heart attack. You never know what God's plan is or why His plan is. It just happens.

 

You have no control who lives, who dies, who tells your story -- Chadwick and I had no control of a 2016 cancer diagnosis becoming a part of a story. And now it just is.